Tag: self-care

When Your Career Conflicts With Your Values, Where Do You Turn?

Published in: Blog |

The American author, Annie Dillard, once said: “How we spend our days is, of course, how we spend our lives.” For many of us, our careers comprise a significant portion of our time, which means our work is integral to how we live our lives day in and day out.

At The Humphreys Group, we are fueled by the work we do for our clients every day. Our advisors are inspired by a set of shared core workplace values to do their best, and we consistently encourage our clients to establish the values that guide their professional, personal and financial goals.

But what if your career no longer fits your values? What if you’ve lost a sense of purpose or direction in your work? What if you don’t feel the connection to your career that you once did? What if you lack the motivation that has driven you in the past?

Given that women today will sustain diverse professional lives and increasingly seek active retirements, this phenomenon is more common than many of us may realize. The first step toward improving the situation is to begin by examining one’s intrinsic and extrinsic goals and values.

Intrinsic values are those unique and personal factors that motivate individuals and contribute to their feelings of fulfillment at work (i.e., improving lives, creative expression, mentoring role, etc.). Conversely, extrinsic values are those that relate to the tangible rewards of employment and one’s specific workplace (pay and benefits, influencing the industry, collaboration, innovation, etc.). Having a strong understanding of your intrinsic and extrinsic values will allow you to better pinpoint what your career may (or may not) be missing, and how you can better fuel what drives your need for purpose and security.

Next, we turn to other experts who offer suggestions that help individuals explore their goals and values; develop a stronger sense of at-work purpose; clarify their career direction; and foster long-term financial security. These suggestions include:

  • Identifying your core values and determining how they influence or fit your current career and goals. This list may help.
  • Examining your organization’s values. This list may help.
  • Seeking overlap between your values and your workplace’s values. This can help you develop a plan to nurture those connections at your current job and strengthen your career goals.
  • Consider whether a workplace or career change may be necessary. Sometimes an individual’s career and goals no longer fit their values, and it’s better for all involved to re-align.

The values we have established at The Humphreys Group guide and strengthen our daily work, our company goals and our client relationships. We welcome the opportunity to help you do the same. Contact us today for assistance with developing strategies that ensure your values are supporting your goals — at work, in life and with your finances.

To Bring Your Financial Goals to Life, Get Strategic

Published in: Blog |

Our last blog focused on suggesting that clients examine whether their priorities and goals need a reset at this point of the year. This can be challenging and emotional work, but when it comes to setting and achieving goals, the accomplished marathoner Juma Ikangaa says it best: “The will to win means nothing without the will to prepare.”

We at The Humphreys Group believe in preparation; we provide clients with specific steps for reaching their goals and gaining a clearer understanding of how their financial strategy can help them do so:

  • Provide a brief description of/reason for each goal. Some suggestions include: “increase current financial security,” “build retirement savings,” “strengthen family ties,” “bolster emergency funds” “pay off debt,” “afford travel,” “fund education/personal development,” etc.
  • Assess how much time, energy and any other additional resources (such as education/training) are required to reach each goal.
  • Estimate the amount of financial earnings, savings and/or investment required to achieve each goal. Begin with a “guesstimate.” We advise that these numbers can always be refined as clients gain more information and work with their advisor to understand what it will take financially to meet their goals.
  • Assign a priority status of “A,” “B” or “C” to each goal and determine the length of time you want to commit to reaching each goal. Having a sense of how important the goal is and how long it may take to achieve can help prevent feeling overwhelmed or under pressure to reach each goal. Suggested timeline categories include: Immediate Goals and Priorities; Short-Term to Mid-Term Goals and Priorities (1 to 5 Years); and Long-Term Goals and Priorities (5 Years or Longer)
  • Consider that priorities may shift. Remember, it’s okay to press “reset” from time to time!

At The Humphreys Group, we believe that priorities and financial goals can give shape to actions, and help provide long-term calm and security in our clients’ lives. We help clients prepare for success by reviewing what meeting their goals will cost in terms of their time, attention, energy and money. Contact us today to learn how you can give life to your goals with a well-prepared financial strategy.

Beating the “Dog Days of Summer”: Do Your Priorities and Goals Need a Reset?

Published in: Blog |

We’ve reached the “dog days of summer” — the time of year when ancient Greeks observed the bright Dog Star in the skies above them, and worried that uncertain times might soon follow its appearance. The constellations have shifted slightly over millennia but, by the time August arrives, many of us are still concerned about what the coming months will bring to our lives. At The Humphreys Group, we think now is the perfect time to decide whether our priorities and goals need a reset; doing so can ensure we move forward through the remaining year with renewed purpose and focus.

Here’s a quick summary of how we help clients determine if they need to rethink their priorities and goals and reset their course for the months ahead:

Priorities

  • Career and family top many people’s lists, but we also recommend a closer analysis of other life components including: health and fitness; financial well-being; leisure opportunities; creativity and educational enrichment; self-care and community ties.
  • We ask clients to review the time and energy they spend on these aspects of their lives and how satisfied they are in doing so.
  • To support clients as they clarify their priorities, we encourage them to establish the areas of their lives where they want to spend as much or more time.

Goals

  • Once clients gain a clearer sense of where their life priorities lie, and whether they want to make adjustments to those priorities, we guide them toward attainable goals.
  • We refer to a variety of tips and strategies that begin with developing “big picture, long-term goals” (such as a five-year plan), then strive to make those goals attainable on a yearly and monthly basis.
  • We explore whether the motivation for achieving their goals is intrinsic (sparked by personal drive or dreams of satisfaction), extrinsic (expectations outside of ourselves influenced by societal, professional or familial reward) or a combination of both.
  • In each instance, we acknowledge that we are doing challenging, sometimes emotional work. We embrace both the emotional and rational aspects of setting priorities and goals as we thoroughly discuss, analyze and make projections about how clarifying priorities and attaining goals may affect each client’s future.

The world has come a long way since the star-filled nights of ancient Greece, but we can continue to take time to reflect on what lies ahead for us. We support individuals’ modern-day efforts to examine their priorities and goals, and we possess the knowledge and experience to help our clients reset them in positive and proactive ways.

Contact The Humphreys Group today for more information about the strategies we use.

How to Cope with the Emotional Impact of an Inheritance

Published in: Blog |

Many of us would like to believe otherwise, but our experience and research at The Humphreys Group shows that a person’s feelings and attitudes about money can affect their approach to financial planning. We’ve also seen how emotions may exert an even stronger influence on those who’ve received an inheritance; in response, we offer our clients several strategies to help them navigate the choices and decisions that arise from inheriting a financial gift.

  • Take time – time to grieve, to remember and to appreciate the person from whom you’ve received your inheritance. Allow yourself to adjust to new life circumstances that the person’s passing, and their gift, may cause. Don’t rush toward decisions without processing your emotions.
  • Begin to assess your financial situation when you feel emotionally ready. Review your debts, your dreams and your goals. Consider how your inheritance may help you address these.
  • Consult with trusted family members about your possible next steps. Will you use your inheritance to pay your debts down (or off)? Will you set aside funds for a child or grandchild’s education? Will you put money toward retirement? Will you direct monies toward a charity? Will you use some of the funds to travel? Explore some combination of these or other potential courses of action.
  • Work with a financial advisor to develop a long-term financial plan for making the most of your inheritance. You should also meet with your accountant and attorney to fully understand the ramifications — for instance, taxes and legal issues — related to your inheritance.
  • Resolve to review your plan, with both family members and professional advisors, on a regular basis. Checking in with these parties from time to time will help ensure that you are thoughtfully and clearly making the most of the empowering gift that an inheritance can be.

At The Humphreys Group, we realize money is an emotional issue for many people. We also know that receiving an inheritance while dealing with the passing of a loved one can heighten the emotionally-charged stakes of managing individual and/or household finances. We have the knowledge and expertise to offer assurances and strategies on how to approach financial planning in light of an inheritance. Contact our advisors today to begin the conversation.

Summer Is Here: Put a New Focus on Self-Care

Published in: Blog |

The time will come
when, with elation
you will greet yourself arriving
at your own door, in your own mirror
and each will smile at the other’s welcome,

and say, sit here. Eat.
You will love again the stranger who was your self.
Give wine. Give bread. Give back your heart
to itself, to the stranger who has loved you

all your life, whom you ignored
for another, who knows you by heart.
Take down the love letters from the bookshelf,

the photographs, the desperate notes,
peel your own image from the mirror.
Sit. Feast on your life.

— Derek Walcott

Give Yourself a Mid-Year Wellness Checkup

Published in: Blog |

If you haven’t realized it yet, we at The Humphreys Group tend to view our glasses half full rather than half empty. So, as we arrive to the midpoint of another year, we want to celebrate where our clients are on their journeys toward growth and accomplishment, and to examine how they are using various resiliencies to fortify their busy lives. We accomplish this through a quick “wellness checkup.”

First, let’s review what we mean when we state that resiliency can help us meet our goals. We know Emotional resiliency is the ability to process and work through challenges that test one’s feelings, but we’ve also discussed other aspects of our lives where we can work to be stronger:

  • Physical: Take preventive steps to ensure you are resting well and breathing properly. Give yourself time to recover from illnesses and address other physical setbacks.
  • Spiritual: Stay true to the values, behaviors and beliefs that guide your efforts to live your most authentic life, professionally and personally.
  • Social: Spend time — in person or via other forms of interaction and communication — developing connections at home, at work and among your community; when challenges come your way, you’ll know who to call on for support.
  • Vocational: Set long-term goals for what you’d like to accomplish professionally, and take small, measurable steps toward them via your networks and relationships. Remember that not all progress has to come in dramatic leaps and bounds.
  • Financial: Work with an advisor to establish a long-term financial plan that grows and changes as your work and life evolve over time.

As part of your mid-year wellness checkup, we offer these additional questions to help you further assess your plan for bolstering resiliencies:

  • Remember that most journeys do not travel in a straight line — can you cut yourself slack so that you can continue to move forward?
  • How can you maintain a sense of optimism as you work to accomplish your goals in each area of your personal wellness?
  • Are you taking charge of your personal and professional stories so that you can speak and act in ways that reflect what you’ve learned and how you’ve grown?
  • Will you share what you’ve learned to demonstrate your resilience? Can your knowledge resonate with and encourage other people in your personal and professional circles on their journeys?

The calendar reminds us it’s time for a mid-year review of our goals and strategies. Let us be among the first to tell you we’re proud of what you’ve accomplished so far, no matter the size of your achievement or the scope of your effort. While our expertise lies in honing your financial resilience, we know you are working hard to make the most of every aspect of your life.

As always, contact The Humphreys Group to learn more about how you can improve your resiliencies and for help with developing a solid, long-term financial plan.

Overcome Your Financial Fears

Published in: Blog |

Our deepest fear is not that we are inadequate.
Our deepest fear is that we are powerful beyond measure.

It is our light, not our darkness that most frightens us.
We ask ourselves:
‘Who am I to be brilliant, gorgeous, talented, fabulous?’
Actually, who are you not to be?

You are a child of God.
Your playing small does not serve the world.
There is nothing enlightened about shrinking
So that other people won’t feel insecure around you.

We are all meant to shine, as children do.
We were born to make manifest the glory of God that is within us.

It’s not just in some of us; it’s in everyone.
And as we let our own light shine,
We unconsciously give other people permission to do the same.
As we are liberated from our own fear,
Our presence automatically liberates others.

— Marianne Williamson

Learning to Receive With an Open Heart

Published in: Blog |

As women, we are often encouraged to believe that “it is better to give than to receive” gifts both material and abstract. And yet, “until we can receive with an open heart, we are never really giving with an open heart,” states professor, speaker and writer Brené Brown in her book, The Gifts of Imperfection.

Brown explores how receiving — a kind word, a heartfelt gesture, a thoughtful gift or simply someone’s time and attention — can challenge and overwhelm many of us. We feel compelled to give back immediately rather than relish what we’ve been given; clearly, many of us have work to do when it comes to becoming more comfortable with receiving.

We at The Humphreys Group have worked with clients and sought input from others on the subject of giving, and examined various ways to become better at receiving. We consider this work as important as any financial strategy — it’s a “holistic life investment” that can also contribute to our overall balance and security, now and over the long term.

In addition to Brown’s thoughts, we appreciate this helpful advice and the following thought-provoking observations about receiving from writer Karen Mead:

  • Receiving takes practice. Most of us are taught lessons about giving from an early age, but we must also be open to learning the value of receiving gifts from others, with grace and without guilt.
  • Receiving involves vulnerability. As Brown has also noted, vulnerability is often viewed as a weakness rather than a strength. But if we are to fully enjoy what it is to receive, we must strive to become comfortable with our vulnerability; doing so allows others to give us something of their time, talents or treasures — enriching our lives and experiences.
  • Receiving can “quench our needs” for connection, validation and attention, just as much as the act of giving can (or sometimes more!). If we find ourselves struggling in our attempts to “give with gladness,” we should consider how receiving gifts with joy and gratitude contributes to spreading happiness into others’ lives and provides others with a purpose. In this way, being able to receive gracefully — free of judgement of ourselves or others — becomes its own gift.

“In the long run, we can’t stay emotionally healthy without accepting gifts, both concrete and intangible. Refusing to receive leaves us chronically empty, prone to addiction, obsession, codependency or an eternal psychological hunger that’s never quite satisfied. The healthy alternative is to stop merely closing down and learn to receive wisely,” states the life coach and author Martha Beck. We couldn’t agree more.

Contact The Humphreys Group to discuss how we can help develop a practice of balanced giving and receiving that’s right for you.

Give Yourself the Power of Reinvention

Published in: Blog |

Reinvention

There is always the possibility

of reinvention

sometimes born of longing

sometimes offered faintly,

like birdsong in your ear

sometimes —

born of pain.

Life is long for a reason.

So that every chapter swells

with a new chapter of us,

so there is time to change

the meaning of your name

to everyone around you,

and especially

to you.

When the name that once meant

tired girl comes to mean

she who rose again,

– then

art begins.

I met a woman

whose house burned down

and in the ashes

she found the blaze of her self.

Now it roars

still angry, sometimes uncontrolled,

always a blinding light.

If you see her on the street,

bow to her courage.

Stare back into her flickering animal eyes,

and know, she is fighting a fight.

– Tara Sophia Mohr

Are Your Giving Efforts Aligned with Your Values?

Published in: Blog |

It’s no secret: women still grapple with societal norms that encourage us to give generously throughout our lives — of our time, our attention, our counsel, our experience, our leadership and even our physical labor. When we begin to develop financial plans, this emphasis on being generous with our innate resources can cause the idea of sharing our hard-earned monetary resources to feel like a challenge.

However, several studies indicate individuals can feel happier and more engaged with their financial management practices when those practices align with their values, and include “giving with gladness” to causes, organizations and other outlets that matter to them.

The idea of “giving with gladness” is not new, nor is it limited to money. We at The Humphreys Group offer support to clients who want to incorporate giving into their overall long-term financial plans by guiding them to assess how or what they can give when it comes to:

  • Their time
  • Their talents
  • Their treasure

We also recommend that our clients reflect on lessons they’ve learned throughout their lives about the practice of giving to help them examine how they might incorporate giving into their present and future. Some questions we ask them to consider:

  • How have you benefited in the past from another person, organization or cause giving you their time, talent or treasure?
  • How have you benefited in the past from giving your time, talent or treasure to another person, organization or cause?
  • What positive lessons have you learned — in childhood, at home, at school, at work, among friends, from your community — about giving time, talent or treasure?
  • How could these lessons influence you to “give with gladness” now and in the future?

That said, we realize not all giving is done with the spirit of gladness or generosity. Sometimes, our experience with giving has been tinged with guilt, obligation, need or anger. The result? We fear that if we give too much, our financial foundations can become shaky. If we give for the wrong reasons, our relationships with those in our financial landscape may become clouded with resentment, neediness, expectation or disappointment.

To bolster a sense of gladness in giving, we help clients analyze occasions when giving may have prompted stress:

  • Did my giving come with strings attached?
  • How did giving without gladness impact me and those around me?
  • How did I cope with the challenging aspects of giving?
  • What financial strategies can I develop so that I do not experience worry when giving?

At The Humphreys Group, we believe that success at “giving with gladness” lies in each individual developing a plan to share their time, talents or treasures in ways that align with their values and fit within their capacities and abilities. That means taking the time to explore the different dimensions of past giving experiences and learning how those experiences have affected their outlook on and approach to giving. Contact The Humphreys Group’s advisors to talk about developing a giving strategy we all can be glad about.