Cutting the Apron Strings: Delinking Your Financial Relationship with Your Children

Setting your adult children on a path to sustainable financial independence can be a delicate balancing act. On one hand, you want to provide support for your children, but on the other hand, you have your own financial goals and responsibilities to consider. The good news is that with a little planning and communication, you can help your children achieve financial independence and set them up for long-term success without funding them through adulthood. Here are some tips and tricks to help ease the transition as you cut the financial apron strings with your adult children.

  • Maintain an open dialogue

One of the first steps is to ensure that the dialogue remains open and honest. Have conversations with your adult children about your expectations. Let them know that you’ll be gradually phasing out your financial support and discuss a timeline for this transition. You might begin by transferring certain financial responsibilities to your child, such as paying their phone bill or contributing to rent, before fully cutting the ties.

  • Don’t underestimate the basics

To ensure your adult children are equipped with the knowledge they need to make sound financial decisions, it’s important to provide them with a solid foundation in basic financial literacy. This includes personal checking accounts, savings and interest, loans and interest rates, credit cards, retirement savings, and insurance. You don’t need to cover everything at once, but gradually introducing these concepts over time can certainly ease the transition.

  • A little honesty can go a long way

Talking about finances can be uncomfortable, but sharing your own experiences with your adult children can be beneficial. Discuss how you manage your finances, the challenges you’ve faced, and how you plan for retirement. This can provide them with a better understanding of what financial independence truly means, as well as show them the steps they need to take to achieve it themselves.

  • Make it an experience

To help your adult children feel more comfortable with the idea of financial independence, consider making it an interactive experience. Accompany them to a bank and open a bank account together or help them apply for a credit card. This can help to ease the anxiety they may feel about managing their finances independently and provide an opportunity to learn from your guidance.

  • Set concrete goals and timelines

Setting clear goals and timelines with your adult children can help promote a gradual transition to financial independence. Work together to set savings goals, draw up a budget, and teach them how to track their spending. Not only can this create a solid financial foundation, but it can also help your children gain confidence in managing their finances independently.

Final Thoughts

While it can be challenging to cut the financial apron strings with your adult children, it’s important to remember that you can still be a supportive parent while encouraging financial responsibility. By gradually phasing out financial support, providing a solid financial education, maintaining an open dialogue, and setting concrete goals, you can help your adult children achieve financial independence and set them up for long-term success.

At The Humphreys Group, we understand the complexities of navigating financial support for adult children while also planning for your own financial future. Our team is here to help you create a financial plan that meets both your own needs and those of your family. Please don’t hesitate to reach out to us to start a conversation about how we can help you secure and maintain your well-being.

Diane Bourdo, CFP®
Diane Bourdo, CFP®

Diane Bourdo is the President of The Humphreys Group. Diane has dedicated her life’s work to helping women make smart financial decisions. For nearly 30 years, she has developed investment management and financial planning strategies that allow her clients to create lives that reflect their values. Diane was named an InvestmentNews 2020 Women to Watch and has been recognized in Forbes, SF Chronicle, NY Times and more for her work and writing.

Diane Bourdo, CFP®
Diane Bourdo, CFP®

Diane Bourdo is the President of The Humphreys Group. Diane has dedicated her life’s work to helping women make smart financial decisions. For nearly 30 years, she has developed investment management and financial planning strategies that allow her clients to create lives that reflect their values. Diane was named an InvestmentNews 2020 Women to Watch and has been recognized in Forbes, SF Chronicle, NY Times and more for her work and writing.

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